“I’m a failure.” My client exhaled loudly. She had gotten laid off from her job the day before – a job she didn’t enjoy, a job that wasn’t using her gifts, skills, and talents well, a job she was hoping to quit. She was trying to pound a square peg into a round hole and when it didn’t work, she was a failure.
Isn’t it interesting that we make it about our identity vs a misalignment or a behavior? Her company had been making cuts for the last several years and was already at half the staff they were when she started. While she knew intellectually it wasn’t about her personally, she was choosing to make it mean she wasn’t worthy.
On our call, we worked through how to rewrite this story so she could detach this label from herself. This is so very important! Making this one incident determine her self-worth not only impacts her mental and physical health, it will also effect how she comes across in interviews. She had to find a way to reframe it.
We worked through how she would like to talk about this experience to her friends and family as she looked back on it in the future. What did she learn? Why was it one of the best things that ever happened? What did it help her realize? What new opportunities arose because of this?
When we can detach ourselves and look at the situation objectively, we see it isn’t about us. We can choose to make it mean we are fundamentally flawed or we can choose to make it mean it was time to explore other opportunities.
We get to choose how we want this experience to effect us and what we do with it. When we choose to see it as another opportunity to learn more about ourself, what we value in a company, the type of work we excel at, the activities that fill us up outside of work, the types of people we want to surround ourselves with, and look with excitement for what’s next for us, we attract what we are putting out there. From that space of self-exploration, learning, and discovery, we draw in the right opportunities, resources, and people at the right time.
Everything is always working out for us when we choose to see it that way.
What story do you need to rewrite about yourself today?
Not sure how to rewrite it? Send it to me and I’ll send you back a rewrite!
Sending you unwavering faith in yourself,
Kori
P.S. Want to work through your story together? Book a FREE Breakthrough Session and let’s do this!