I used to be shy. I was the type of person who preferred being behind the scenes to center stage.
My stepdad nicknamed me ‘mouse’ because I was so quiet and always seemed to be hiding.
I struggled with low self-esteem and confidence. I was self-conscious and worried about what others thought of me.
At various periods throughout my life, I have thought I was fat, ugly, stupid, and overall not good enough.
Instead of buying into these lies, I did the work to uncover the truth.
It wasn’t easy. It was often uncomfortable and many times I wanted to throw in the towel and go back to my old ways. Yet, I knew there had to be something greater than living in such a state of insecurity. I knew I wanted to be free to be all of me no matter who I was around, what I was wearing, what I looked like, or what I was doing.
I didn’t want to live constantly comparing myself to others, criticizing myself, holding myself back, and feeling down about myself and my life.
I knew, somewhere deep inside, that if I had created all this struggle, I had to be able to create its opposite – a feeling of freedom, security, and ease.
Step by step, day by day, I did the work to shift my beliefs, thoughts, and actions.
I went on to overcome a decade-long battle with eating disorders, earn my Master’s degree, live and work outside the US for several years, travel abroad solo for multiple months, perform as a burlesque dancer, improv actor, and spoken word poet, become a university professor, community trainer and workshop facilitator, and communication and self-expression coach.
Being center stage no longer scares me. What people think of me no longer has power over me.
I have learned that what matters is what I think of me and how I treat me. I get to choose my state of being in every moment – it no longer fluctuates based on the situation or the people I’m around. This also means I choose situations and people who elevate me both by challenging me to think differently and by loving me and all my imperfections without the need to change me.
This is huge. It has given me a freedom like no other and a new kind of security. It has given me me back.
If this is speaking to you, I invite you to schedule a call with me.If you are tired of the comparison game, done going through the motions, and over being so hard on yourself, join me to learn a new way to be which will set you absolutely free.