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I lived in Costa Rica for almost two years and the first four months were rough.
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I was living with a Costa Rican woman with whom I had a challenging relationship. I was dating a man who couldn’t have been more wrong for me and chose to be unavailable.
One morning as I was heading to the bus stop, I broke down in tears. What have I done? I left my family, my friends, and my home. I brought myself and my dog to this country where I didn’t feel welcome.
A woman who ran the yoga teacher training I attended lived a few hours away and I visited her over the holidays. While I was there, she could tell I was struggling.
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She asked the obvious question, Why don’t you leave?
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As soon as she said it, a huge weight lifted off me.
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I thought that I had to live with the consequences of my decisions – instead of deciding I didn’t like the consequences so I could choose to change them.
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That changed everything.
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I didn’t leave but having “permission” to leave made staying feel different. It now felt more like a choice than an obligation.
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I still faced challenges the remaining time I lived there but I found ways to enjoy as much of it as I could. I saw it as an opportunity to find peace within – to be ok no matter my situation.
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We need to see we are only limited by our perception of our situation. When we can see we have a choice in what we experience and that just because we are going through a difficult period doesn’t mean we made the wrong decision and we need to suffer for it.
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All it means is we chose something. We then discovered it was different than we imagined. Now we get to decide what to do next.
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We learn best from a place of curiosity over criticism.
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We can learn to let go of our need to get it “right,” learn to strengthen our faith, trust it is somehow all a part of God’s plan, and know it will all work out for our good even though we can’t see what that looks like. (AND, I can help you with that!)
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We can choose to walk a different path.
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What can you give yourself permission to do today that would take off the heavy weight you’ve been carrying?