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…and stuck…
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When I was first starting my business, there was a lot I didn’t know. I sought out information like an alcoholic seeks out their next drink. I had to have it and I had to get it, and then I would be ok.
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I see now that was a defense mechanism. As long as there was more to learn; as long as I didn’t “know,” then I didn’t have to take those scary actions of really putting myself out there. I would share posts that were general and vague so that no one would reach out to me. Clever, isn’t it?
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It’s like the person who is the perpetual student but never the teacher. I was hiding.
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At the root of this is that old fear of not enough – that you need more information, training, and strategy to prove there is nothing wrong with you.
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But that keeps you perpetuating the belief something is wrong with you as the search for a “fix” outside of you has no end. Hello, frustration.
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The point of learning is to use the information, apply it, and create something from it.
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Once I noticed this tendency to be in constant seeking mode, instead of criticizing myself, I got curious.
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I sought to understand this behavior from an objective perspective, like a doctor analyzing the symptoms of their patient.
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You see, the brain is wired to win, so even though being in a state of confusion was keeping me from progressing as quickly as I wanted to, the brain saw being stuck as winning.
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As long as I was “unsure,” I could keep seeking new information, which was safe even though it was making me miserable.
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There is often a contradiction here. You see, I learned that I got attention for being smart, which felt validating, but at the same time, I was afraid of attention as I saw getting too much attention led to conflict in my home.
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I learned ok, achieve, be smart, and lay low. 🤨
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From this place of curiosity, I could then see how this pattern developed my gift in being observant. I see the deeper layers behind the person or situation. Being introspective as a child helped me see more deeply into people and their desires and motivations.
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As I owned the gift in the “struggle,” I could release the struggle. 🎈
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This new awareness led me to create a three step process to transform confusion to clarity and analysis to action. That helped me stop the constant searching, build trust in myself and my gifts, and increase my confidence in putting myself and my gifts out to the world.
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When I guided my clients through this process, they also had amazing breakthroughs. They were able to break the spell of searching for the answer outside of them, uncover their unique gifts, and then invite clients into their programs with confidence – in a matter of days.
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We go on these journeys and face these trials so that we can be led back to the truth – that the answer lies within. The work is getting support in uncovering it, then owning its power in serving others, and acknowledging that therein lies your purpose. 👑
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Are you ready to get out of confusion and analysis paralysis and create clarity in the work you are here to do and take aligned actions to get it out to the world in a bigger way? DM me and let’s have a conversation to explore my 75 day Master Heart, Brain, and Body Business Expansion Mentorship. If it’s a good fit, we can get started right away.