dream

Your dreams and desires were placed within you precisely because what is required to get them will, at times, terrify you. They are placed within you to get you to reach beyond your self-perceived and self-conceived limitations. There were placed within you to get you to face your fears and excavate your shadow self. That is what they are there for – to lift you out of the fog, to wake you from your slumber, to scare and excite you, to move you beyond the confines of your family stories and generational agreements. That is why you chose such big dreams.

Any little dream isn’t going to incite a rebellion within you. But a big dream, the dream that keeps you awake at night thinking about it, that dream will stir up all the legions of the shadow army to stop you. And that is exactly why you require your big dream – to break the spell of the shadow, to demand a higher level of consciousness for yourself, and to raise your standards in every area of your life.

What you have settled for up until now is no longer acceptable to your spirit. It requires you to go to war, to activate your sovereign self to defeat the shadow and to take up your rightful place as the ruler and creator of your life.

The desire to love the skin I’m in required massive transformation and required me acknowledging and defeating all the shadows that crept in to stop me – self-worth, addiction to approval, codependency. I couldvé given in and said, you know, it’s fine, my body is ok, i just have to be vigilant. But I couldn’t. My dream and desire had me and wouldn’t let me go, no matter how fierce the internal battle raged. No matter how long it took, no matter what it took, that dream was MINE. and it took me on a ride – to the deepest depths so that I could truly know what a real high was, not a mediocre high or an almost high, but a true high.

Every resource and every tool had to be exhausted until all that was left was me, which is where the solution lay all along.

Now I see that is exactly what I needed – those were all things – scarcity, abandonment, struggle, suffering, suicide, codependency, self -worth and self-belief –  that had to be mastered or they would continue to master me for the rest of my life. And the shadow is powerful, deceitful, a trickster. It has everything to lose. Which is exactly why you must choose big dreams because if not, you will succumb to the shadow. You won’t be willing to fight the battle of your life for some mediocre dream.

Now I truly get it the full meaning of whatever it takes, no matter what and now I can say, isn’t it wonderful that this happened – that I dealt with eating disorders, body hatred and shame, and self-worth issues – because it unleashed shadow after shadow after shadow after shadow so that I could be free and so i could see that yes, yes, yes indeed, this WILL be. No doubt in my mind.

I now love, honor, appreciate, and celebrate my body without restriction, vigilance, obsession, or criticism. I feel absolute freedom to eat whatever I want, move my body how I desire, and feel great in my own skin. This wouldn’t have been possible if I had given in to the shadow’s lies – ah, come on, it’s not that bad. Do you really need all that?

Yes, You Do.

That’s why one of my clients who struggled with her weight and body image chose to pursue a career in acting. It chose her so that she could confront the exact issues required to be her true full self. And acting was the portal through which to achieve that.

And another client who struggled with acceptance and approval chose to pursue painting and drawing. The very thing that would bring her face-to-face with the core issues that needed to be addresses and transformed.

It is perfect when you see your dreams have chosen you very specifically.

What is it for you? That thing that you desire deep in your bones yet at the same time, it scares you because you know it will require your utmost courage, determination, resourcefulness, and creativity beyond anything you’ve experienced before?

Are you willing to do whatever it takes, no matter what, no matter how many demons assail you to answer the call of your true soul desires?

I am here to guide you when you decide to answer the call.

It’s time to ride.